Are You Capable Of Abandoning Your Parents?



Based on what he’d recently read, a colleague of mine asked me why is it that more and more Malaysians are leaving, or wanting to leave, the country.

Now, how do you answer a question like that?


How many Malaysian do you know who have either migrated or want to migrate?

I can’t say I don’t know because I do know a lot of people who have either left and/or who are contemplating of emigrating. I guess it has become everyday news that we hear Malaysians emigrating or wanting to emigrate to other countries. Whatever the reasons may be, the fact that a lot of Malaysians, especially the Non-Malays, want to leave or have left is statistically becoming higher by the day.

To be perfectly honest, personally, I have also entertained the same thoughts. But unlike many Malaysians who have to start practically from scratch - studying in that particular country doesn’t count - I have another home to go to; a country where I could prosper not based on my citizenship status but solely on my capabilities to compete intellectually and professionally.

But you know what, the only time I would ever think of totally emigrating is when My Small Baby is agreeable to the whole thing. And I know, right now, that is not possible. Moreover, as much as I want to work in other countries like the way I am doing now, I don’t think I want to completely emigrate, y’know?


Yes, Malaysia is a multiracial country but there is no equality amongst its citizens

Anyways, before I digress; indeed, why do many Malaysians want to leave the country? Off hand, I can tell you that it’s because, with the kind of government we have, equality and fairness amongst all races would never be achieved and implemented. One race would always be preferred over the others and that is an unfortunate and sad fact.

And that is why, majority of those who have either left, those who want to leave and those who are seriously contemplating of leaving are the non-Malay citizens of Malaysia. Can you blame them? Of course not. It’s been over 50 years and yet, they are still getting the raw end of the deal from the government.

Most of them are young and rightfully so, because there won’t be too many prospects for those who are old. But there’s one thing that bugs me though: how could these people abandon their parents and or siblings? I mean, if the entire family is emigrating, then all is good but in most cases, it is not. It is also not the case where the parents could visit them as often as they want. Those who have emigrated always leave their parents behind and this is what irks me.


How many of them are coming back?

How many of these emigrants eventually bring their parents to wherever it is they settled? Really, how many? I know it’s none of my business but what happened to filial piety? I don’t know but if I were to be in the same situation, I still couldn’t see myself emigrating without my parents.

Fortunately, I am not in the kind of situations that most émigrés have to go through. I mean, I do understand why they feel the need to leave the country, I really do. I also understand that part of the reasons why they have to leave is to ensure that their parents would be able to live comfortably with the money that they would be earning somewhere else.

But still…


Majority of the occupants of Old Folk Homes in Malaysia are Chinese

I don’t know man. While I do understand the reasons, I still don’t agree that they should leave their parents behind. I don’t have to outline the sacrifices our parents had to go through to give us better lives and I certainly don’t have to explain that sending money - no matter what the amount is – is a close substitute to being with our parents, especially as they grow older. Look, I ain’t dissing those who have emigrated and left their parents; I just wonder how they could do that, that’s all.

One of the things that made the late Yasmin Ahmad great was her ability to tell a story that most people wouldn’t dare to concede. In 2006, her Chinese New Year Petronas TVC perfectly encapsulated what I am trying to say. And believe you me, it’s no coincidence that this is a CNY ad, and not a Raya or Deepavali one.

Here, let me refresh your memory. Watch the video below and you’d exactly understand what I’m saying.


Watch this ad and you'd know what I'm talking about

My Small Baby is also Chinese but I’m glad that like me, she could never entertain the thought of leaving her parents behind to make a better life for herself, even if that so-called better life is extended to her parents. Nothing could substitute being physically there to take care of our parents as they see and live through their golden years.

It's the least we can do for the people who brought us into this world.

‘Nah mean?

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