An Open Letter To Ivan Omar

Dear IO;

I know you more than anyone else in this world and that’s a fact not even you can't deny.

I know it’s been a hard 2010 for you but you know what, this ain’t nothing you can’t handle. I’ve seen you defy all odds in the past and overcome whatever it is that was bothering you. I ain’t saying it’s easy but I know you, sometimes more than you know yourself, and I’m telling you dude, you’ll overcome this.

It's time to fully let go...

I know your life has changed forever since that magical night in February 2009 but whatever happened since then, rather than arrogantly shrug it off ala Kanye or dirt it off ala your main man Jay-Z, take it in the chin like the man you’ve always been and like the man your parents raised you to be.

Keeping the bitterness about the whole betrayal thing ain’t gonna help dude and you know that. You have always worn your heart in your sleeve, I give you that but you’re too damn smart to have done what you did and while I understand why, it’s really time to let go, y’know?

You very well know that if one is strong, moving on is easy, really. And you are strong; always have, always will. I also know that part of moving on is worrying about the ones we leave behind and that is always the difficult part. More often than not, when people move on, they’d naturally feel some sense of guilt for moving on with their lives because they’re not sure how the ones they’ve left behind are doing.

Don't worry a thing about what you think you're leaving behind; the chances are they're doing fine

But c’mon now dude, you of all people know that in your case, there’s nothing to worry about. I feel you, I do. I know it’s not even whether there is a valid reason to be worried, which in your case there’s none, but people worry nevertheless, and I know that. I feel that. I understand that.

Mistakes are painful, but as time goes by it becomes a collection of experiences called lessons, you once told people that and I remember. You were such a great guy, I’m not saying you no longer are, but you’re allowing what happened to cloud the very reason why you are great in the first place – the ability to take everything in your stride and learn a lesson from them.

I really and totally understand where you are coming from, dude. You’re a total alpha male; you’ve always exude the kind of confidence that only you could muster. People either love or hate you for it but since when did you give a damn anyways, eh? I get it that what you went through recently broke your very core, I really do, but how long will you punish yourself for what you’ve lost?

Look, I ain’t saying don’t give a damn about it because I know how much it meant to you. And the way you were hurt is almost unheard of for someone like Ivan Omar to go through. I know it was the first time you experienced such a painful humiliation but dude, you gave it all and people know that.

It's aight to be empty. In fact, it's better to be empty. You can start filling up life with new memories

The things you’ve done to make it up is so unlike you but you did it anyways just to prove that you were sorry, even if the whole thing wasn’t entirely your fault. You humbled yourself like you’ve never done in your whole life and if that ain’t enough, you can look back and tell yourself that you did everything you could, y’know?

And that is more than enough.

We all know Ivan Omar is arrogant but that’s what makes you you. People who don’t know you well hate you for your arrogance but those who do love you for it for they know your arrogance is not without justification. Didn’t she say that one of the things she loved about you was that your arrogance made her safe? Didn’t she say that your arrogant swagger was one of the reasons why she fell for you?

And yet, you brought yourself to set aside your pride, all in the name of love. You know what, it’s ok, really, to lose your pride over someone you love but you didn’t lose the one you love because of your pride and that is something you should be proud of.

I know you’ve gone through such horrible times and you are always angry at yourself and at everything and everyone; that is the reason why the things you did afterwards are so horrendous and so unlike you. You love to love and while you hate with the same passion, you don’t prolong that hatred. You, Ivan Omar, need to let go of the feeling of hatred fast!

You love to love; so stop hating, aight?

Mind you, it's really a waste of your time and energy to rip yourself apart over something you no longer have the power to change. There are so many positive things you can do with your emotions and energy and albeit it may feel good to replace your feelings of love with hate, this can still lead to complications and mixed emotions of love and hate which are never a good thing. The succeeding events followed just confirmed this.

And worst, you know all this! So, what gives Ivan?

In your heart and in your mind, you believed that whatever you did afterwards was the right thing to do. It was the right thing to do. It was the right thing to do.

Why then, even after all that and right at this very moment, it still feels so wrong?

Only you can give an answer to that. But if it helps, let me advise you now: all you have to do is be the Ivan Omar that you’ve always been. Believe you me, as your grieving begins to lessen, you will find it so much easier to understand valuable life lessons from the whole experience

You once told someone that nothing in this life is ever a failure if you manage to learn something about yourself. Just because it didn't work out doesn't mean it wasn't a necessary part of your journey to becoming who you're meant to be. Why don’t you start practicing what you preached?

It's time to move on and achieve greatness

Don't let your pain define you, dude. Always remember you are better than this; you have a past and a future. This is nothing but an episode which will pass and you’d be on your way to being the great dude that you are.

I know you’re on the road to a full recovery. I also know that you have started taking back control of your life. Just continue to do what you’re doing and as always, the future looks great for you.

Should you look back, even once in a while? Yes you should, but as you’ve said, only look back to smile and remember the beautiful parts of your past.

Let me end this open letter by citing a quotation that best encapsulates this whole thing:

“to forget, we need to remember...”

Peace out.



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