It’s Time To Say Goodbye

I woke up today thinking and reminiscing of what transpired in the last year.

Oh, there were definitely highs and lows but I promised myself that when I get back to KL, I’m going to be a new man. And in the process of being this new man, I have to let go off certain things and people; some of them and whom I have learned to love so much.

But I need to say goodbye. I need to move on with my life. I need to let go off the past – even if it’s so hard – to have a future.

I once told someone close to my heart that in order to forget, we must remember. Hence, in order to fully move on with my life, I need to forget some things and people that touched and even enriched my life in the last year.

And I start with remembering.

In the weeks that I have been confined in a room writhing in pain, what got me through was reminiscing and remembering both the good and the bad times.

And now, as I slowly recuperate from what I went through, I am proud to say that I have done enough reminiscing and remembering. I’m also confident that once I’m back on my feet, I would have forgotten.

I have sought forgiveness from those I have hurt; both in my my actions and in my words. I even went out of my way to apologize to someone by standing by her when her future was in doubt despite what I was going through myself.

I also promise myself that I will make amends with those who still care and who would allow me to. But I have also come to the realization that some things or people will just have to go and be booted out of my life.

Despite that though, I want to remember the good and leave bad memories behind.

Someone texted me just now and asked me if I was angry about how things went down. In her text, she said she could feel the anger in my last entry. I replied and told her that yes, last night, I was a bit angry but it was more than just that; I was actually more hurt than anything else with what I have been hearing and how certain individuals have been acting.

But despite all the hurt, at least I found out who amongst the people I’ve been closed with the last year I could count on. They stood by at my darkest and lowest hour and some, like the one who texted me, risked their friendships with her long time friends to tell me the truth.

And to them, thank you so very much.

So from today, instead of being angry, I’m gonna take the high road and stop myself from posting entries aimed at people who are clearly not in my league and certainly not worth my time.

It’s time to say goodbye.


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