It’s Not Where You Start, It’s Where You Finish

I know, I know; another cliché no?

But hear me out first and perhaps, maybe, you will understand where I am coming from.

Why do we always give too much fuck on people’s past? I know I don’t but a lot of the peeps I came across in life tend to dwell not only in their own respective pasts but also those of the people they are attached to. What saddens me more is that in the end, because of the inability to let go off one’s past – either yours or the one’s you love and care for - friendships are lost and relationships are broken.


All of us have a past, all of us. But we need to move out of it and/or move out of continuously dwelling on the past of someone we love or else, we will definitely lose sight of what is in store for us.

Over lunch the yesterday, my colleagues and I couldn’t help but be amused with the couple sitting next to us. It is clear from their conversation that these kids just started dating. In between their quarrel, the boyfriend turns to the girlfriend, his eyes full of sadness and envy and spoke about not being the first, rather diffidently. My first reaction was like, “aah, kids…” :)

I guess it’s normal for the young to boast about being the first, it provides for some bragging rights in an otherwise insecure and lonely world. But, taking the cue from the young lovers, how many of us end up with our ‘first’? The world has changed dramatically since the days when sexual relationships outside marriage only happen to whores; the world has changed and it is up to us to move with the changes.

So what if you're not the first? Where are they now anyways?

In the present world, one needs to understand and realize that everyone has a past. And while I am passionately against those who try to live their current lives with an overdose of their past, I am a strong supporter of the need to recognize our own and someone’s past. But one needs to tread carefully between the two; recognize the past but don’t live in it, even but for a few stolen moments of happiness.

Yes, cliché as it is, it’s not which position you started, it is which position you ended, that truly matters.

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